Originally published in the March 2004 Issue of Link & Learn. 

Early in my consulting career, a senior executive provided me with some sage advice. He said there were three things an executive must do (which the majority don't) to ensure corporate and personal success. Since he was a powerful and respected person, I perked up in anticipation. According to him, effective executives differentiate themselves from the pack through these three things: "communicate, communicate and communicate."

I was disappointed by wisdom that seemed so obvious. But 15 years later, I now realize how right he was.

Surveys indicate that employees generally want more honest and frequent communication from executives. Yet executives perceive themselves to be honest and frank and think that communication channels are wide open.

Recently, in a discussion with a Human Resources Vice President at a major financial institution, this point was driven home. The Vice President was coaching the company's Chairman on a series of meetings with regional and department managers. The Chairman was erudite and impressive, one-on-one, and believed that he would do a great job. To some degree he did. The managers learned a lot about the Chairman as a person and the company's values and strategic direction. The Chairman finished those meetings feeling as though he had made a big impact on key people; however, the managers didn't feel as though they had been communicated with at all. What went wrong?

For one, the Chairman asked few questions. He failed to invite the managers into a dialogue. He did not ask about what they needed or wanted to know from him, and he learned next to nothing about them in return.

There's no shortage of books and videos focusing on how to communicate. Experts and consultants have studied the issue well enough to know that communication is as much about receiving information as it is about providing it. And while many executives are aware of this, few practice it when and where it counts.

Is this a serious concern or just frivolous whining? Consider the impact. Employees who feel they aren't being communicated with adequately also perceive that they are not trusted or respected.

Now flip that around and ask executives what they really want out of their employees. Most place loyalty, commitment, passion, and innovation high on their lists. But how can they expect such emotionally charged energy from someone who feels excluded and not trusted because they are kept on a need-to-know basis?

The need for the "full story" has a root cause in the need to know, which in turn is generated by the need to feel as if one belongs. Employees who say they have a sense of belonging have three things in common:

1) They know what's expected of them and why;
2) They feel driven to make a contribution to the organization's success; and
3) They trust that their contribution will be recognized.

If that's starting to sound like communication, it should, because it is through communication that such a supportive environment gets established.

Many of us, both in and outside of business, find communication challenging. Too often, executives fail to recognize the additional impediment that power and position brings to their conversations. Do employees, for example, respond positively during a conversation because you are making a real connection with them or simply out of fear and respect? How would you even know the difference?

Consider the loss, not just in meaningful connection, but in information sharing, as well. After all, how much can a leader really learn about what is going on if information is buffered, filtered or hidden during conversation? How can he or she coach, advise, manage or problem-solve what is not revealed to them?

Many organizations even have communication as one facet of their core behaviors in company-wide competency models. Executives should always consider themselves "under surveillance" when it comes to how well they demonstrate core behaviors. If they fail at communication as often as surveys indicate, how much does this undercut the competency intervention?

Leaders need to be held accountable whenever employees don't get their message or fail to feel communicated with. Creating two-way communication is about producing power, not relying on it. Real power comes from sharing information. The more you give, the more you get back. Both sides need to walk away knowing they have learned something new and built a better relationship in the process.

Following are a few tips for making conversations more meaningful:

• Personal learning styles influence conversation styles. Determine one to better understand the other.
• Have both sides clarify what they want out of a conversation and use that as a measure of success.
• Direct yourself outwardly by asking questions, listening carefully, paraphrasing to be sure you understand, and following through on what you learn.
• Ask for feedback a day or two after the meeting to gauge how effective a connection you made and what can be done better next time.
• Back your words by your behaviors. Always walk the talk.

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This article was originally published in Workplace News; © 2003 Strategic Action Group, Ltd.

David S. Cohen is President of Toronto-based Strategic Action Group, Ltd., and author of The Talent Edge: A Behavioral Approach to Hiring, Developing and Keeping Top Performers (John Wiley & Sons Canada Ltd., August 2001). He has consulted to organizations in a diverse group of industries in Canada, Europe, the Caribbean, South America and the United States, specializing in the design and delivery of leadership development, management development programs and integrated human resources processes consistent with the corporate, values, vision, behaviors and business plan of each client. David has facilitated numerous sessions on defining corporate values and coaching leadership to build firms based on their values (ethics). He has also facilitated processes of alignment to share them with employees. Prior to joining Strategic Action Group, he was a consultant with a number of other consulting firms in the area of organizational development and leadership development. He is a frequent speaker on the topic of creating integrated Human Resources systems based on behavioral competencies. Contact - tel: (416) 650-9786; e-mail: david@sagltd.com; web: www.sagltd.com.